By chance, she was swept to the side of the street, and when her back hit a wall, she was able to catch her breath, before her friend saw her and pulled her out of the melee.
With no police or official crowd control measures in sight – an official investigation would later slam “massive failings” of preparation and response – Kim said the confusion and chaos continued for hours, as she sheltered in a nearby bar with her friend.
She had no idea what was happening or how close she had been to death.
“I went out to the streets of Itaewon and saw people lying on the street receiving CPR. Ambulances were parked disorderly on the road and people were being taken away, but even then I didn’t think that all those people were dead,” she said.
WRITING TO HEAL
Kim walked for hours to get home, in a state of shock.
“I couldn’t sleep for two days. As if obsessed with something, I couldn’t turn off the news on TV. I couldn’t eat, I couldn’t sleep, I only drank water and kept watching the news.”
Kim, a writer, struggled with feelings of survivor’s guilt, and eventually her therapist suggested that writing about her feelings might allow her to process what had happened.
At first, she shared her writing only in private forums online, where she received overwhelmingly positive feedback, including from others who said it had helped them with their own Itaewon-linked trauma.
After one of her posts went viral, local newspapers asked her to write for them, which she eventually agreed to – but the reaction from the general public was overwhelmingly negative.
“When it was released to the public, I did not receive comfort from the reactions I received. Personally it was good as a way to release my feelings and it was helpful in relieving my depression,” she said.
Source: CNA
