‘I just want to be free’: Some Filipinos see potential relief as country readies to legalise divorce

The priest said because divorce is illegal, there have been many cases where couples set aside their differences and stay together. The bill, he said, will only enable gold diggers to get married repeatedly in search of alimony and assets.

But congressman Mr Lagman said the proposed law already has several safeguards against those looking to abuse the legalisation of divorce.

These include very strict grounds from which a couple can seek a divorce such as physical abuse, infidelity or abandonment and there is a yet-to-be determined period where a recently divorced couple would have to wait before they can remarry. 

“This is not a no-fault divorce. We are not in favour of the Las Vegas type of divorces. We do not sanction the notarial divorce where spouses would just appear before the notary and say that they want to be divorced and it’s over. We have made very strict provisions to prevent the abuse of the law,” he said. 

“I JUST WANT TO BE FREE”

With a good chance of the bill becoming law, anti-divorce campaigners have stepped up their rhetoric.

Several churches in the Philippines have adorned their facades with banners saying “no to divorce” and “what God has united no man can separate” while services are frequently filled with sermons warning churchgoers that legalising divorce threatens the sanctity of marriage and will invoke God’s wrath. 

Supporters of the bill are also feeling the heat with some activists telling CNA that they have received threats, criticism and condemnation on their social media pages. 

“Whenever I posted something on divorce I would have many comments saying that it is a big sin, if we die we will go to hell, that we only want divorce so we can marry over and over again,” Mdm Estoya, who handles the Divorce Pilipinas Coalition social media, said. 

“Sometimes we got into a heated discussion. We told them ‘how about those who were abandoned and neglected? How about those who were abused? Would you like us to suffer in silence until we die?”

Pressure for these pro-divorce advocates to stop what they are doing can also come from their own families and close friends.

“Even my mum, who is in a Catholic organisation, would tell me ‘don’t get involved with that divorce group anymore. (Legalisation of divorce) is never going to happen. Leave them’,” Mdm Mary Bravo, a 54-year-old mother of three who informally separated from her husband in 2009 for irreconcilable differences, told CNA.

“It was disheartening. But I won’t stop. I have three daughters and God forbid that they find themselves in my situation. (By legalising divorce) they won’t get trapped. They will have a way out. That’s what I want to happen. It is for the future generations. Not for myself.”

The Senate still has to deliberate on the bill before they can pass it into law and there are several senators who have stated that they will try to block it. Mr Lagman said he will continue to lobby members of the Senate to get the Absolute Divorce Act approved.

He also expects several organisations to bring the case to the Supreme Court and challenge the act’s constitutionality should it pass the Senate and become law.

“Which is why we are in talks with the Supreme Court to explain what the bill is all about,” the congressman said. 

Mr Lagman said should the bill pass into law, there will be a brief period when the country’s judicial system will have to make a few adjustments before it can start hearing divorce cases. 

“But it shouldn’t take long because (divorce cases) will just be like any other civil cases,” he said. 

Mdm Jessica said she cannot wait for the day when she will finally be able to divorce her abusive husband. 

“I shouldn’t be trapped in a marriage like this for the rest of my life. I just want justice for what has happened to me,” she said. “I just want to be free.”